With Congress, every time they make a joke it's a law, and every time they make a law it's a joke.
Politics has got so expensive that it takes lots of money to even get beat with.
We are all here for a spell get all the good laughs you can.
I traveled a good deal all over the world, and I got along pretty good in all these foreign countries, for I have a theory that it's their country and they got a right to run it like they want to.
There's no trick to being a humorist when you have the whole government working for you.
What the country needs is dirtier fingernails and cleaner minds.
I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts.
There is good news from Washington today. Congress is deadlocked and can't act.
Everything is funny as long as it is happening to Somebody Else.
[ 1 ] | 2 | 3 | 